Thank – FULL

Today I am a thankful man. God has blessed me in so many ways.  I have a peace beyond any human understanding of knowing that my God is in complete control of my life every day, hour, minute and second.  With that I have been reflecting on the blessings of God in my life.

It saddens me to think of someone going through a terminal illness without God and without His Word.  It makes more sense now why some without God go off the deep end, looking to fill their pain with drugs, alcohol, other addictions or even suicide.  My “end” is just the beginning.  This life I live is a comma in the grand scheme of God’s time table.

A few specifics for which I am thankful for today:

1)  Our bathroom has been renovated and is much easier for me to get ready in now.

2) My family continues to be patient with me, even when each week brings a new challenge.

3) Friends who come over anytime I call to help me move furniture, fix my lawnmower, or simply hang something.

4) Driving my Vibe with the help of the “suicide” knob. You should see me take those sharp corners.  Dena says when she sees me on two wheels, she’s taking my keys away!

5) Listening to Christian radio in the car.

6) My weight continues to remain steady at just under 200 pounds.  It’s important that I not lose more or I may have to have a feeding tube inserted.  But right now I am still enjoying food through the regular method.  And for once the doctor’s are advising me to eat everything “bad!”  Amen and Amen!

7) Laughter, even though I squeak like a 6 year old girl…(no kidding, he really does)

8) Sitting on my front porch reading, as the sun sets.

9) The sound of my kids and their friends…teens are still my favorite people to be around!

10) My wonderful, gracious church family of Cornerstone.

On Sunday I was able to once again share my story, this time a few hours west at Northbridge Church in Kalamazoo.  I was in seminary when Ray was in college.  He and his wife, Grace, have an amazing ministry going there.  I appreciated getting reacquainted with them and seeing how God has used them.

So today I am full of thanks.

Philippians 4:6 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Weakness and Strength

I’m sure most of you have experienced the occasional muscle spasm or cramp after a hard work out;  Or you have felt that annoying twitch in your eye or lip when you are in tense situations.  What’s your reaction?  You want it to stop, right?  You think everyone around can see it.  You find it hard to concentrate on anything else until that painless, but extremely annoying, twitch disappears!

One of the symptoms of ALS that I now live with is that my entire upper body is constantly experiencing these tremors…except the doctors don’t call them tremors or twitches – they call them fasciculations.  The medical definition is “involuntary movements or twitchings of groups of muscle fibers.”

If I could emphasize anything from the definition, it would be the word “involuntary.”  If I could stop it, I certainly would!  Rest your hand anywhere on my arm, shoulder or chest for more than a few seconds,  and you would think there were electrical currents going on inside of me.  It’s constant contractions;   I feel like my muscles are bouncing off the walls; it is crazy madness.

In fact, the first neurologist whom I met a few days after Thanksgiving, knew immediately that I held ALS by looking at my tongue.  Apparently, ALS is the only disease where fasciculations occur on a resting tongue.  I couldn’t figure out why she stared in my mouth so long until later when she shared that fact with us.  Even neurologists don’t like to have to diagnosis a fatal disease to a patient;  She was trying to convince herself that it wasn’t true.

Before my disease, I rarely gave thought to my muscles throughout any given day.  Sometimes after a hard workout, I might get a leg cramp and eat a few bananas.  Now I am aware of my muscles every waking second.

As my physical weakness increases, so does my acute awareness of my need for God.  Daily I need his Word or I quickly fade into negative thoughts and sadness.  Satan attempts to poison my mind with his lies which would lead me to doubt God’s truth.  This battle is not fixed by a simple read my Bible to check it off my to do list;  It requires vigilance and a discplined choice of my will;  Then the Holy Spirit aids me in believing His Word and being faithful to it.

Included in this weakness comes the fact that I should no longer shake hands.  My fingers are curled and a firm grip is painful; Raising my arm too high or shaking it is also uncomfortable.  My right hand and arm are much worse than my left.  So I need to make a change and I need your help. I am going to attempt to reach out to greet you with my left hand, but I prefer to do a gentle “fist pump.”  As for hugs, they need to be loose and soft. My shoulders can not take squeezes or pats on the back.  This is hard for me to say, because I love greeting others and have always taught the teens to have a firm hand shake.  But there are exceptions to every rule, right?

Speaking on the phone and texting have both becoming increasingly difficult; so these too are limited.  Dena returns the necessary phone calls and the kids help me text or send emails when I am too tired to attempt it.  Please know that I read your facebook entries and comments on my blog, but I can not respond to them.  I appreciate all the support and love you continually show.  Thank you for understanding.

James 5:11  Behold, we consider those blessed who remained steadfast.  You have heard of the steadfastness of Job and you have seen the purpose of the Lord, how the Lord is compassionate and merciful.

Family Fund Established for the McGoldrick’s

(Written by Tim Stevens)

I’ve hijacked Patrick’s blog this afternoon to let those who love the McGoldrick family know about an opportunity. Some of their friends and family have come together to establish a fund to help their family. The money will be used primarily for college expenses for Paige and Parker–but also for big expenses that might be coming around the corner related to Patrick’s disease.

I would like to make two requests of you…

1. Would you consider contributing to the fund? Any gift size will make a difference. Perhaps you’d even be willing to set up a monthly contribution.
2. Would you help us get the word out to people you know who love Patrick and Dena and who might want to help them through this difficult time? Do this through phone calls, emails, Facebook, Twitter or any other way you can.

There is much more information available at the donation site that has been set up to receive gifts. You can click on the button below for more information.

Video of Patrick’s Message 4/22/12

 

 

Overflowing

Words can not express how full of joy my heart was throughout this past weekend.  Friends and family came and packed out our auditorium to hear what God laid on my heart.  From TN, NC, PA, NY, NJ, KY, OH, IL, IN, IA, CO, & AL they came.  Some flew, some drove, but all came to show their love and we were completely overwhelmed by it. All 12 former interns were here. Locally, we were supported by several co-workers from Prevail, families and schoolmates from Lutheran North and our fantastic neighbors.  Many former teens from around the area came along with their young spouses and babies; Even my friends from Fifth Third Bank and Dena’s hair dresser showed up.

But more importantly, God showed up.  I have never preached for one hour.  I don’t know what I expected when I prepared a message the way I normally do, yet my mouth and speech are anything but normal.  So what should have been 3o minutes lasted twice as long;  Normally I am closely tuned to the clock.  On Sunday, it seemed like time stood still.  I got out what I wanted to say;  there were some embarrassing moments of laughing too hard and some vulnerable moments of losing it with tears, but to the best of my ability, I said what I needed to say. I know that the prayers on my behalf were heard and God answered by allowing my speech to be clear enough to be understood.

It’s only been a few days, but the response has been amazing.  E-mails, cards and blog posts have been written kindly telling me about what the message meant specifically to each author.  I appreciate hearing about how God is working!  I don’t know the end of the story yet, but I know God is writing it and I am along for the ride.  And oh what a ride it is!

Special note to my Cornerstone family:  THANK-YOU for everything…you gave me space to be with my loved ones I don’t see often; you provided nourishment for me and my friends; you hosted my guests in your homes; and you continued to show forth God’s love.

Our cup is overflowing.

Proverbs 11:25 “He who refreshes others will himself be refreshed.”

In the next few days, we will the video of the message available on the blog.

Tomorrow

This is a last minute reminder and invitation to come to our church tomorrow, April 22nd, where I will be speaking  on “Who will you trust?”

Here’s the information:  Cornerstone Baptist Church, 17017 Twelve Mile Road, Roseville, MI  48066

Service starts at 10:45 and there is free child care for infants through kindergarten.  Or if you prefer, there are “cry rooms” at the top of the auditorium with glass and sound system so you can see and hear the service without your children being a distraction to others.  Make sure you arrive early enough to park and come in and find a seat.

For those of you unable to come due to distance or other commitments, I would appreciate your prayers that I can communicate clearly what God has laid on my heart.  I need strength physically and emotionally.

Thanks Friends!

Proverbs 3:5&6 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and do not lean on your own understanding.  In all  your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your paths!”

Renewed and Ready

This will be short and to the point.  I have had many ups and downs in the past few weeks.  Living with a disease that gives me new symptoms every week is not easy.  I have been discouraged as I am having to give up more and more of my independence.   Things I never thought I would need are now a part of my life such as a handicap sticker for my car, a quad cane to help with balance,  and a bed rail.  I need help cutting my food, getting dressed and carrying things.

These are not natural for a man my age.  It’s tough to swallow.  Please pray for me to continue to have grace and humility.

But the good news is that last week, I was able to attend a conference with thousands of others.  Together for the Gospel is a bi-yearly conference in Louisville, KY.  I heard messages from David Platt, John Piper, Matt Chandler, Ed DeYoung, Al Mohler, Legan Duncan & CJ Mahaney.  I was challenged, convicted and encouraged.

That was the beginning of the week.  I finished the week by driving down to Granger, IN to hear Ed Dobson share his story again at GCC.  After the service, we had the privilege of eating with he and Lorna at Dena’s brother’s house. This time we laughed a lot as we compared some ALS stories.  It was refreshing and let’s face it, we need to find a few things to laugh about.

And so I have been richly fed with the truth of God’s word and I have been encouraged by fellowship with another ALS sufferer who loves Jesus.

I am blessed.  And I am ready for another week.

Psalm 121:2:  My hope is from the Lord, the maker of Heaven and Earth.