Voice and Pen

One of the best decisions I ever made was choosing to marry Dena.  Before her, I brought home a few other girlfriends from college.  My parents were kind and polite to each one.  But after meeting Dena for the first time, my step-father whose words were few and compliments even fewer, told me that she was the kind of girl I should marry and not to let her go.  I was convinced very quickly and eventually I convinced  Dena.  June 17, 1989 was the day we made it official.

Now we are going on 23 years of wedded bliss.  Ok, so it hasn’t all been bliss, but it’s definitely been blessed.  Our marriage style could be defined as  team work.  Not that we assign duties and demand that the other one do their part.  No, we have morphed and changed through the years to help each other out wherever we see the need.  Some things Dena is better at (like the laundry – she won’t let me touch it) and that hasn’t changed in all these years.  I’ve pretty much always claimed the lawn work (although Dena will insist you know that she grew up mowing yards and is perfectly capable) and car maintenance.  Lest you think these are the stereotypical gender related jobs, there are plenty of other things like finances and cooking that we’ve both shared the burden of and it’s switched back and forth through the years.  Since we are both leaders and strong-willed (aka stubborn), we don’t necessarily like working right next to each other in close proximity for hours on end.  We’d prefer to cheer the other one on from the room next door.

All that to say… our team work spills over into every area of life….including this blog.  Since beginning the blog back in December, many of you have commented on how well it’s written.  You have been very kind and even suggested I should consider writing a book.  While I have been honest with anyone with whom I spoke personally, I now need to make a public disclaimer:  Dena is the official writer of these blog posts!

Most of the topics we first discuss together;  The thoughts and ideas are my own.  Yet when it comes to putting my thoughts onto the paper, or computer in this case, that job is hers.  After she writes a draft, I give the final approval before it gets posted.  And although she is the pen, it’s my voice and therefore it’s written in first person from my perspective. I explain my thoughts better through speaking, while she can put them into words more clearly.  And since we’ve been married so long, she knows my thoughts pretty well.

God has gifted us each uniquely and in a marriage relationship, those gifts should be enhanced, not diminished.

Give Dena a microphone and she’s going to run;  Give Patrick a microphone and he’s going to make everyone laugh.

Give Dena a pen and expect a a few pages of detailed explanation with correct grammar; Give Patrick a pen and he’ll draw a stick figure.

We are a team; We have always been a team.  In marriage, in ministry, in parenting.  Now as we walk through the most difficult journey of our lives, a team we will remain.

Proverbs 18:22 “He who finds a wife, finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord.”